Usually, when we as Christians, attend the 1st Sunday of Advent Mass, we start to think about the X-Mas holiday, even though we start hearing about advertisements from the store or Xmas carol songs from car radio stations before.

We try ready for His spiritual coming on this earth and try to look back on how we lived the past whole year.

This year, before I do anything special, I try to prepare to know Him a bit different way.

First I look into one of His most important and influential saints, Apostle Paul. Yet, he never actually met Jesus during his life in Jerusalem, and he received the biblical name Saul and the Roman name Paul. The Acts of the Apostles quite the famous phrase heard on the way to Damascus "Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting me?" (Acts 9:4)

When I and my husband lived in Rome, we visited that site. According to the record St. Paul was the creator of theology, the founder of the church, and the defender of the Sacrament. Before he was a Jewish Pharisee and Roman Citizen, he persecuted Christians in Jerusalem. (Acts 8) later he beheaded for Christ in Rome.

Even though St. Paul was not one of the original 12 Apostles of Jesus, he was one of the most prolific in the New Testament and who spread the teachings of Jesus in the first-century world.

Stephen Hawking has achieved international prominence as one of the great minds of the twentieth century, as well he is the author of the book "The Brief History of Time" and talked about The Big Bang to Black Holes.

Yet, he was an Atheist. However, he talked about how while there is life, there is Hope.

God is the name people give to the reason we are here, "Remember to look up at the stars and not down at your feet. Try to make sense of what you see and wonder about what makes the universe exist."

As I read the book, the end of his life, he believed in God.

In the literature world, I like to write about Nathaniel Hawthorne is American Novelist and short story writer, born in the year 1804 and died in 1864. His works focus on history, morality, and religion. One of his written books, Scarlet Letter written in 1850 is interesting to me, the reason is all people sin no matter who they are or what status they have.

Yet, Hawthorne also makes it clear that people can learn from the consequences of their sins and that sin can help a person change for the better. Hester Prynne, the protagonist sins adultery with the minister of the church when her husband is away and gets pregnant, and the baby girl Pearl is born. When her husband finds out he seeks revenge.

By her public punishment, she is forced to wear a scarlet letter on her chest. Even when Pearl grows up, her mother Hester never tell who is Pearl's father, even though she feels shame and the minister feels guilty and confesses his sin in public and he dies.

Later her husband die and all his belonging and property go to little Pearl. His novel shows the inner conflicts of individuals and society and describes the truth of the human heart.

Last weekend, I attended the funeral Mass, of who passed away from a heart condition, yet, I have known their family for more than 50 years I never had a chance to talk to him, only knowing his wife Anna on a few occasions.

Even though their family is Korean, the funeral Mass was held in an English-speaking Catholic Church where their family was Parisher for more than 40 years. During the year, I assumed they were very much devoted Christians.

At the Mass, we had two priests who led the Mass, one priest was a previous priest who transferred not too long ago, and the previous priest knew the family much better and close friend.

During the homily, the priest compares the couple to St. Joseph and Mary, and I was surprised. 

Usually at a funeral Mass, the priest talks about the person's family, school background, and how he lived his life, yet, does not compare with Saints. He preached to us about her late husband with St. Joseph who helped Mother Mary very quietly without many words.

That makes me feel so proud about being there and to think about myself and how the rest of my life lives a better way.

When we leave this world, we are not going to take anything, everything will be left behind.

When I looked up the alter where his picture was displaced, he had a big smile on his face and it seemed that he had flown away freely.

The next day I visited the memorial garden where my husband was resting, I told him, please fly away freely and highly, do not indulge with earth. Is it possible to do that?

the second week of December,

Clara Cho.

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